Let's learn , Mama!

Homeschool Chat with Noor Sayyed

“Children are, by nature and from birth, very curious about the world around them, and very energetic, resourceful and competent in exploring it, finding out about it, and master it. In short, much more eager to learn, and much better at learning than most adults. ” ~ John Holt

Today’s homeschool chat brings you Noor Sayyed , who quit her job as a software consultant in 2012 to home educate her two boys. She also has her own website https://simplifyhomeschool.com/ , where she writes on various topics from homeschooling to anything parenting related. Noor also launched her online clothing business a few months ago. “https://hebacollection.com/ started as a homeschool project to learn and teach some important life skills. As a family, we strive to create situations where learning happens organically. What better way to do it than to combine our own passion while actively engaging the children and leading the way as partners and contributors rather than students and teacher. Starting up, managing and sustaining a business poses a lot of interesting problems and demands creative thinking, problem solving skills and a growth mindset which in our understanding are the most valuable skills we can teach our children to prepare them for the future. We are learning everyday within this real life context and growing a diverse skillset from photography, website development, product design, quality assurance, inventory management, sales and the list goes on. Whatever you see on this website is a combined team effort of our immediate and extended family. ” Noor is also active on Instagram @simplifyHomeschool , where she shares beneficial homeschooling advice and snippets of their homeschool life.

1) Tell us a bit about your family and your child/children.

I have two boys aged 9 (nearly 10 ) and 6 years old.

2 What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your chidlren ?

The freedom to customize education and give them a quality education while not compromising the values and morals that matter so much to our family. I personally struggled with my faith in my youth and the main reason for that was peer influence so I didn’t wish that for my children. I read a wonderful book “Hold onto your kids” which talked about this problem with replacing adults by peers who become a compass for young people way too early resulting in a lot of confusion and problems. This book did not mention homeschooling but quietly convinced me to explore it with some seriousness. I worked backwards from the desired outcome and figured out that homeschooling was the best option both in terms of giving a solid foundation in secular education along with instilling Islamic values and an opportunity to work on character development.

3 )What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family ?

Our typical day begins with our morning routine which is basically making bed, grooming, drinking milk and starting with journal/playtime.

We follow a rhythm rather than a schedule. So it helps to divide the day into ‘routines’.

Then we have some core lessons. Read alouds and then they get busy with independent work. We take lots of breaks. We sit down for math again. Lunch and dhuhr. We do a bit of reading and some discussions or activities in the afternoons. Some days we work on life skills, these days it is all business related work. Last year it was a lot of wood working. So it varies. And then outdoor play/family hike or family swim. They spend a lot of time playing. Everybody knows what is expected and things just happen at this point. Alhamdulilaah. There are expectations and it is not loose ended as it may seem but not too regimented either. I like to call it ‘freedom within limits’

4 What type of a home educator are you ( structured , semi structured , unschooling , classical , Charlotte Mason , Steiner , Montessori etc )

Since I started very early(my son was only 2.5 years old) I got a chance to experiment with a lot of different Homeschooling methods. I read about every method that was out there. Montessori, classical, unschooling, project based learning, unit studies, Reggio Amelia,Thomas Jefferson Leadership Ed, Waldorf, Charlotte Mason… I have even tried to follow different aspects of these. . It is hard for me to say I am a certain type of homeschooler. I firmly believe that homeschool success comes when we observe and pay attention to our own selves and our families and find something that works for us. Sometimes we cannot fully adopt a philosophy and that is okay. As long as we are sincere, consistent and flexible based on needs, homeschooling can be an amazing journey of self growth and self discovery that we collectively get to experience as a family. I don’t think I answered your question but let’s just say we are a Charlotte mason inspired classical homeschoolers with strong unschooling tendencies who indulge in real life projects 😆😝

5 What do you love the most about home schooling ?

Everything – Isn’t it obvious ? I am blown away by the possibilities. The freedom, the joy of learning, developing a close and real relationship with family members. Ability to focus on unique but vitally important areas like creativity/innovation, personal development and character building. I could go on and on.

6 What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

this is a tough one. I don’t teach what I dislike. Because it’s hard for me to hide my feelings. So I simply outsource those type of things. I love maths and science. If I had to point out a subject I find difficult to teach, it would be Arabic grammar.

7) What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children

Balancing creativity with pragmatism within our homeschool. But I am so darn proud of how far I have come. I think I am pretty close to nailing it.( Don’t ask me this question on one of my bad days though)

8) How do you deal with unsupportive family , relatives and friends ?

Empathy & acceptance. I convince myself that it is coming from a good place and I legitimise the concern. Then I make a case and reason out with calmness. But I don’t expect them to get convinced in one conversation. Instead, focusing on your work, with time the same people will become your biggest supporters (assuming they were genuinely concerned). This has been my personal experience. But this takes time. Just don’t depend on people and learn to have a tough skin as you get into homeschooling, this is expected in the first few years.

9) Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years’ time ?

I don’t know exactly. When I looked into it, I researched it thoroughly and looked into every detail as to how to do it all the way to high school. But I haven’t planned a year by year. We will take it as it comes. I do know all the resources that will come in handy.

10 What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children ?

1. Invest in yourself. Learn, read books, attend conferences, take classes. Equip yourself with knowledge. These things will empower you.

2. Observe your children and your self and work to adapt homeschooling to serve you and your children and your family culture.

Homeschool Chat with Happy Muslim Homeschool

“The beauty of home education is that it gives a family more time together–time to solidify relationships, to communicate values, and to focus on each child’s individual needs in a consistent and unhurried atmosphere. “~ Kimberly Hahn & Mary Hasson

Today’s Homeschool Chat brings you @happymuslimhomeschool, a Muslim homeschooling mama, who loves her faith, all things homeschool and coffee, both hot and cold. She also has a blog –https://happymuslimhomeschool.com , where she regularly posts lesson plans, printables and resources that may be of benefit to other homeschool mom’s. On her blog , she also writes about mum’s specific issues which she feels aren’t discussed enough in the Muslim homeschool community, so her blog is a support network for mums which goes beyond sharing resources. She is releasing her first book this September Insha’Allah, the first book ever written especially for Muslim homeschooled children!

1. Tell us a bit about your family and your child/children

Asalamu alaykum everyone, its lovely to be taking part in this Homeschool chat series! We are originally from the UK, however moved abroad a few years ago. Our children are between the ages of 5 and 12, and are an energetic bunch Allahuma barik. They are all passionate and enthusiastic, so there’s rarely a dull moment around here!

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2. What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children

I didn’t always intend to home educate my children, it was something I never even knew existed at first. I had always dreamt of pursuing a career as a primary school teacher, and intended to put my children into a good Islamic school. However, I realised pretty much straight away that the public education system wasn’t meeting the needs for my child. By this time I had heard of home education so we took the plunge and never looked back!

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3) What does a “typical” homeschool day look like for your family?

We start the day early, usually everyone is up by 7 am. We are all morning people so this works well for us, alhamdulillah. After breakfast, some outdoor time and typical morning routine things like bed/teeth we start off with Qur’an memorisation and revision straight after. My youngest is usually content with playing with his toys, as he’s had some time with everyone at breakfast. I then listen to the children’s Qur’an one by one, and whoever finishes plays with the youngest. After Qur’an we take a little break and then start our table work for the day. Thus includes Brave Writer, Islamic Studies, History, Science or Geography. We used to do this block of work in the afternoons but I’ve recently changed this up. We try to get this done by Dhuhr, so in the afternoon we have ‘lighter’ work which is more independent such as assigned reading/Art/read alouds. This gives us ample time for outdoor activities.

4) What type of a home educator are you ( structured, semi-structured, unschooling,classical, Charlotte Mason, Steiner, Montessori etc) ?

I don’t follow any homeschool philosophies, and I don’t extensively research them either. I guess if anything we are an eclectic homeschool family since by default we do bits and pieces of everything.

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5) What do you love the most about home education ?

I love witnessing my children grow, not only physically but also intellectually, spiritually and in character. I also love that we grow as a family too in these areas, as homeschooling is definitely a family experience.

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6) What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

My favourite subject to teach is Qur’an, and History. My least favourite is probably maths but I don’t detest it either!

7) What do you find challenging when it comes to homeschooling your children ?

There are so many challenges that come with homeschooling, from meeting the needs of multiple kids, homeschool burnout to over worrying! I discuss a lot of these things on my blog because I think it’s important to acknowledge that homeschooling is hard. However, there is a solution for everything and I think one of the biggest ways to prevent all of the above is to take a step back from anything ‘school’ related, and just enjoy your family. But first and foremost I remind myself and fellow mothers that making du’a and consulting Allah with all your worries is key. We can physically do everything for our children but guidance is from Him, and it’s important to acknowledge this often and ask Allah to grant us goodness for our children and our families in this life and the hereafter.

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8) How do you deal with unsupportive family, relatives and friends ?

I don’t really pay too much attention to it, but also I think in most cases unsupportive family are just concerned, and fair be it. More often than not when they see that the children are thriving and indeed are learning, that concern disappears. My advice is to have confidence in your decision, you know the needs of your children and family best.

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9) Where do you see your homeschooling journey in 5 years’ time?

In five years’ time, our eldest will be seventeen; a scary thought subhanallah! My hope is that two of our kiddos have several iGCSE’s under their belt, and they have all progressed well with their hifdh journeys. More importantly, I hope that my children are growing up to be responsible and God conscious youngsters who have grasped the basics of their faith and have some idea how they can use their skills to benefit the wider community.

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10) What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children ?

I would say pray istikhara and go for it. Don’t wait for the perfect space or routine, it will come with time. Start slow and steady with a couple of subjects, and then build upon them once you’ve found your feet a little.

Home educating is a blessing from Allah and one to be cherished; it’s truly a beautiful journey where the whole family thrive, so enjoy it while it lasts.

Homeschool Chat with Mariya Khan

Today’s Homeschool Chat is with Mariya Khan, a homeschooling mama of 4 , residing in the U.K. Mariya and her husband are the creators of the popular Islamic picture book, ‘If Allah Wills’ and the new, practical parenting blog: https://www.theyareourfuture.com/

Their aim is to empower Muslim parents with practical tools and resources that will help them raise their children to be strong and confident Muslims.

They have also published their first picture book, ‘If Allah Wills’, which was created to fill a gaping void for our under-served Muslim children – they are in dire need of regular, light-hearted books which represent their Islamic identity and culture. I really cannot recommend enough their book. It has a very original and captivating story and the illustrations ( done by the talented homeschool mama Mariya) are really stunning and beautiful. Although the book is targeted for younger children, aged 2-6, I am fairly convinced that even older children would love the book. This book would also make a great addition to any school and public libraries too. ” If Allah wills ” can be bought from Amazon-https://amzn.to/2YtOdkN

1. Tell us a bit about your family and your child/ children

Assalamu alaykum and Hello !

My name is Mariya, mum to 3 boys (aged 12, 8 and 2) and 1 daughter aged 10. Originally from Pakistan, I was born and brought up in the UK and married my husband when he was still a student back in 2006. We’ve been settled in Birmingham for over 4 years now – a record amount of time for us, as we’ve always travelled and have lived all over England including London, Liverpool, Cheshire, Preston, Staffordshire, Milton Keynes and Luton too. I’ve also lived in Pakistan as a child when my father decided to try moving us back there in 1998, (it didn’t quite work out and we returned within a year) and in Cairo, 6 years ago, when I went to follow my dreams and study Arabic. I’ve always home educated my children, though I never in a million years imagined I would!

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2) What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children?

I had just given birth to my 3rd child whilst my first born was still only 3. It was a challenging time as my husband was still a full-time student and we didn’t have any family support. Needless to say, I had my eldest signed up to nursery and eagerly awaited the start date. But then came 3 small, yet life-changing experiences.

There was a fundraiser at the nursery my son was meant to start at but on spending more time and chatting with the nursery nurses, who were friendly and jolly, I returned home with a heavy heart… When my eldest was born I had formed dreams and hopes for the character I would help him to build, and the skills, talents and self-esteem I would nurture in him. Now out of desperation I was handing this still very tiny,beloved son of mine, over to strangers who wouldn’t be able to give him the time, energy, attention and understanding a small child really needed. He was just too young, his mind so undeveloped and his individual needs too great…

We took a 2-week holiday to Ireland soon after and it gave me plenty of time to think about what I really wanted from motherhood and how I really wanted to nurture my children. And then I met the teenage sons of my dear friend, mentor and veteran home educator, Sara. I distinctly remember observing her older sons with their younger siblings; how gentle and connected they were. Wow, I had thought, what has she done differently to achieve such harmony and respect between her children? I had not seen or met teenagers like them before, ever. That was enough for me, I prayed for guidance, felt comfortable with my decision and committed to internally and personally grow by continuing to raise and teach my children at home.

There’s a wonderful saying in Arabic “A mother is a child’s first school”. I’ll do it until they reach 7, I thought, then they’d be ready for formal education. For now, it was all about developing their mind, sense of self and core foundations for the future…

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3 What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family?

To be honest there is no typical day. We’ve been learning at home for nearly a decade now and every season I switch up the schedules and routines to accommodate normal life changes.

There is only one constant no matter the time of year; as soon as breakfast and clear up is done, we all sit down to learn Qur’an for an hour.

Currently, after Qur’an the kids have a little snack break (yes, they’re hungry after an hour!) followed by read-aloud learning which we try to do altogether, as often as possible.

By 1pm we’re ready to have a break, so we stop for lunch and prayers.

Maths is the last academic session of the day, which is quite autonomous for my older 2; whilst I sit with and assist my 8 year old. Of course, no 2 days look the same, even without educational trips, social meet-ups or library visits, my toddler is sure to get his hold of the day where ever he can 😀

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4. What type of a home educator are you (structured ,semi structured , unschooling , Steiner , Montessori etc ) ?

You know, I’ve been doing this for a fair amount of time now, and though I’ve heard of and briefly looked into different methods and styles, I think I always aligned our home education style with my children’s needs and abilities plus my own understanding of the primary curriculum.

I’m probably naturally inclined to the semi-structured style, as it gives routine for children which they thrive on and makes family life a whole lot easier. But saying that, I’m not the most organised of people, it’s been a continuous journey of self-development and personal growth for me.

I do know that over the years with big life tests, home schooling was put on a back burner at points. Out of fear for the children ‘falling behind’ I would routinely have them completing workbooks and text books. Our once joyful and exciting learning style had become mundane, lifeless and unmotivating. And then when my 3rd child appeared to have zero ability to sit down and learn from books and paper, I knew I had to radically change things up. So back in December (2018), after meeting the most inspiring, gentle and patient primary school teacher turned home educator, (who had won the heart of my 8 year old) I purged our educational resources, stripping everything right back to basics and began our new organic learning style. Plenty of read-aloud sessions of various texts, subjects and levels, accompanied by natural oral comprehension, literary analyses and dictation, copy work or creative writing.

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5 What do you love the most about home schooling?

I love having my children close to me. In a world where families are so disconnected, dysfunctional and orientated around the individual, I know, by being able to facilitate their learning, I can show them the beauty and wonder of the world by preserving and nurturing their innate innocence and curiosity.

I love being able to feed their characters and nourish their souls in addition to formal academic education. To me education, or ‘learning’, as we like to call it, is entirely holistic. Within every hour of their day, they are learning and growing. Life skills – through preparing a meal and clearing up afterwards or putting the shopping away, taking care of a younger child, or being able to open a book and learn for themselves when I am occupied. And people skills through spending time making conversation with and assisting our lovely, elderly Irish neighbours or sibling negotiation and cohesion at all hours of the day, and being confident enough to arrange their own returns, lending, reservations and questions with librarians or paying for and asking for assistance from shop keepers on a regular basis. This, for me is education. Instilling in my children a love of learning and awe for the world and setting them up to successfully navigate and get the most out of life when they’re adults, God-willing.

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6 What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one?

I don’t think of it as teaching. We learn together. I think I enjoy learning about social and historical topics with them. Being able to read, watch or listen to something informative and discuss what we’ve learnt on so many levels and how it affects us, is probably the most satisfying.

If you want to know whether I’m a Math or English kind of girl, then you should know I’m all for Maths, though through our new read-aloud journey, my children are showing me how incredible and powerful language can be, so perhaps I’m beginning to be both… Who knew?

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7 What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children?

For me, it has to be the exhaustion. Home schooling is hard work. I’m quite a mentally in-tune and passionate kind of human, so I regularly tire myself out just by a read-aloud session. And there’s all the hats you have to wear as a homeschool mum every hour of the day – mummy, teacher, friend, cook etc… You always have little people depending on you, and as they get older, the physical work takes a back seat whilst the mental workout moves to the front.

I do struggle to keep my cup filled, as it empties very quickly being me. A wonderful instagrammer called @mindfulmuslimah reminded me though that getting personal time in the morning is so vital in keeping us busy, child-centred mamas going. It goes hand-in-hand with the Prophetic saying “My people (will find) blessing in the (early) mornings”– so I’m trying to make that a routine now,

8)How do you deal with unsupportive family, relatives and friends ?

Being in our 10th year of HE now, we’ve gotten used to knowing not everyone, even your closest family, will agree with your choices, especially home schooling.

I say to anyone starting out or finding it difficult to deal with comments and remarks etc. to come back to yourself. Do you fully believe in what you’re doing? Write it down – it really helps. Get your heart firm on your goals, principles and reasons for home schooling so that when anyone questions or comments on your choices, you don’t need to defend yourself and try to win them over through words – let the actions do the teaching. Focus on nurturing your chicks, keep your team strong and don’t expect others to agree or even be respectful (it’s a sad world.)

What we are achieving together as a family is so rewarding, and worth any difficult hour we ever struggled through, but people are strange and different, some have come on board and some haven’t. Honestly it doesn’t matter. Take joy in the goals you’re working towards and surround yourself with like-minded people – spend more time with them than with the unsupportive ones. Lastly, don’t give weight or significance to any form negativity, it will just jeopardise your success. Be fierce and brave – kill them with kindness!

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9. Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years time ?

Wow Eva, these questions are pretty heavy. I’m feeling almost half guilty to say that my eldest will be starting secondary in September. Though that was difficult to type, we’ve been working towards this milestone for 2 years now and I am fully confident that it’s the right decision, God-willing.

It is difficult knowing my first–born’s full time home education is coming to an end, but at the same time I know for him, it’s the best next step in his journey.

Having been able to home school for 5 more years with him than I had originally intended has been highly rewarding, and I am grateful to have achieved this.

So in another 5 years, I expect he will have completed his GCSEs, whether whilst being at school or at home (we’ve always maintained with him that even though he loves the idea now, if he wants to return to HE then he’s perfectly welcome to.

I don’t know what the future holds for my other children, my 10 year old wishes to continue being home schooled and my 8 year is probably more inclined towards practical learning, so I don’t know what he will choose. My toddler will be 7 so starting his formal education, God-willing.

I guess whatever choices we make over the next 5 years, my main hope is to always have the children’s wishes and best interests at heart. Wherever we are, whatever we’re doing, God-willing.

10) What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children?

Give yourself 2 years to decide whether its right for you or not. When you start, whether you’ve deregistered a school-going child or are continuing on from toddlerhood, do not rush into over-scheduled, workbook-filled days. Focus on building your connection and bonds with each other. Follow your child’s lead in what topics they like, sit together, read and talk. Get out and about in nature and in the world, and slowly and naturally learn. Don’t set yourself any academic expectations or targets, start by enjoying being with your child. Educate yourself on gentle parenting techniques and simple child psychology. Always keep it relaxed and fun. Then start to understand how a child learns and identify the skills and knowledge you would like them to acquire. Keep it simple and know that there is no right or wrong way. Know that when you choose to home-educate your child, you’re signing up to educate and develop yourself too – work on your own struggles whether they’re academic or mental, allow yourself to grow and bloom alongside your child.

And lastly, believe in yourself – you got this mama !

Mariya Khan – https://www.theyareourfuture.com/

Homeschool Chat with Rhythms and Rivers

Let children alone… the education of habit is successful in so far as it enables the mother to let her children alone, not teasing them with perpetual commands and directions – a running fire of Do and Don’t ; but letting them go their own way and grow, having first secured that they will go the right way and grow to fruitful purpose. ~ Charlotte Mason

Today’s Homeschool Chat is with Katy, an American homeschooling mama of 2 boys (Mikel and Marc). They also have two dogs- Zeppelin and Gypsy, who complete their family. She also has a blog – http://rhythmsandrivers.blogspot.com/ , where she writes about her adventures, Classical, Charlotte Mason and Waldorf education, homeschooling, finding balance, building a strong foundation, parenting and co-parenting, the Army, marriage, love, essential oils, recipes, and their overall family dynamic.

1) Tell us a bit about your family and your child/ children

I am Katy @rhythmsandrivers, wife to JD, and mother of two boys. My husband is in the United States Army, so home changes for us every few years. We are believers, lovers of nature and music, and seekers of adventures. If you are ever interested in our life outside of homeschool, which includes lots of photos of our dogs, you can follow my personal account @misskatyyyyy

2)What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children ?

When we lived in Colorado, our kids started out in a public school. For 2 years, our oldest attended public school (preschool and kindergarten). Our little completed a year of preschool in the public school system. We moved to a new house right before our kids were set to start kindergarten and first grade, thus making a switch in schools for them to a different public school. That school ended up being a complete nightmare for our family, so we made the decision to unenroll our boys and start taking them to a local charter school that just happened to be a Waldorf school after a friend recommended it to us. Switching to Waldorf Education is something that changed our lives in such a positive way that I am forever thankful for the year that our family had in the school and community prior to our move. The change in schools led to an overhaul of our home. We changed their methods of play, exposure to media, involvement in the arts and music and doing this drastically changed their overall well-being.

These big changes led to some serious soul-searching as parents. We discovered that our children were thriving as a result of the changes that we had made in our lives. We knew we had an upcoming move that would take us to a new state and away from the school, so we had some big decisions to make in regards to our children and their schooling, which really effects their entire lives.Ultimately, we decided that homeschool was the best option for our family upon moving to Louisiana. We are now in Georgia, in our fifth year of homeschooling, and we are absolutely loving it.

3) What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family ?

We begin our day with breakfast followed by morning basket time. From there, the boys work on math and then the rest of their school work. We are at the point in their education where we are working on time management, so they have a large part in planning out their school days. We eat lunch together, finish school work and then either read aloud or free read in the afternoons. Once all school work is done, we do chores and start our afternoon and evening activities.

4) What type of a home educator are you ( structured , semi structured , unschooling , classical , Charlotte Mason , Steiner , Montessori etc )

We have had an interesting homeschool journey, which began with public school, followed by a Waldorf charter school, which led us to homeschool. I have documented our journey in the first few posts on our Instagram account, @rhythmsandrivers. Our overall approach is a combination of the things we find beautiful. We use a Charlotte Mason inspired approach with a little bit of Waldorf, a little bit of Classical, and as many adventures as possible. Our overall goal through homeschooling is to build a strong educational foundation while raising men of God in the modern world.

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5) What do you love the most about home schooling ?

I absolutely love homeschooling. I love the freedom that comes with it, the time I get with our kids, and the ability to meet each of their needs exactly how they need to be met. The best part for me is that I am redeeming my own education as I educate our boys, and I have the ability to instill scripture and Godly values in them as they grow, which is very important to us.

6) What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

I teach Bible, history, geography, science, maths, citizenship, language arts, literature, foreign language, culinary and agricultural arts, music, arts, handwork, and typing. We have a rhythm that we follow, rather than a timetable, to ensure we cover everything each week without overloading our days. The only thing set in stone is our morning routine. We eat breakfast as a family then dive into morning basket work (https://www.instagram.com/p/BqY3ulxhN0j/) at our dining room table. From there, our formal school day starts off with math followed by reading and other activities. All of that being said, I don’t have a favourite or a least favourite subject to teach. Some days are more rewarding than others, and some days are a struggle, but in the end, my favourite thing watching my kids learn and learning alongside them.

7) What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children

In every season of homeschooling for us, something has been most difficult. When we first started, the most difficult thing was feeling like I was doing enough. The self doubt was really tough to overcome the first year for me. During the next few years, the most difficult thing was feeling like I was doing too much at one time, but looking back that season is where we really found what works best for us. Right now, the most difficult thing for me is not overloading our outside of school schedules. As the boys get older and we get more involved in sports, church, and community, we can tend to overload our schedules and that definitely puts stress on the beauty of our homeschool days.

8)How do you deal with unsupportive family , relatives and friends ?

When we made the decision to homeschool, our families understood our reasoning, but had some reservations about it. Fortunately, as the years have passed, our families have been very supportive in every decision we have made in regards to homeschooling.

9) Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years time ?

In five years, our children will both be approaching graduation. Our plan is to homeschool through high school and have our children dual enrolled so they graduate with college credits. Our hope is to have raised and educated well-rounded men of faith with hearts for the Lord.

10) What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children ?

You CAN do this!

There are many methods to choose from, but you will find what works best for you and your children.

You don’t have to be a purist in the method you choose.
Make sure you take time to pour into yourself. One cannot pour from an empty cup.

You are not failing. I repeat, you are not failing even if it feels like you are.

If you are someone that feels like you are failing, just keep giving your best. You are enough. Your best is enough.

Continue reading “Homeschool Chat with Rhythms and Rivers”

Homeschool Chat with Adele Jarrett-Kerr

Play is often talked about as if it were a relief from serious learning. But for children play is serious learning. Play is really the work of childhood. ~ Fred Rogers

Today’s homeschool chat brings you Adele Jarrett-Kerr- a homeschooling mama of three (8, 5 and 3) , who lives in Cornwall together with her husband. She’s a writer and breastfeeding counsellor who grew up in Trinidad and Tobago. She blogs at Beautiful Tribe about big, beautiful ideas that have the power to connect people. You can follow her homeschooling journey on Instagram.

Adele Jarrett-Kerr

Instagram: @beautiful.tribe

Blog: http://www.beautifultribe.co.uk/

Twitter: @AdeleJK

1. Tell us a bit about your family and your child/ children

Hi! I’m Adele. I live in Cornwall in the UK with my husband Laurence and our three children who are eight, five and three. I’m originally from Trinidad and Tobago in the Caribbean. I’m a writer and volunteer breastfeeding counsellor and Laurence is graphic designer and organic vegetable farmer. Our flexible work allows us to share our children’s home education.

2. What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children?

We started talking about home education when I was pregnant with our first baby. I’d met various people who were home educated when I was growing up and the idea appealed to me as a way of giving the family more time together and allowing our child to have more freedom to pursue her interests. We’ve just come to the end of our fourth year home educating and have acquired many more reasons since.

3. What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family ?

This seems to change every time I’m asked this question. This past year we’ve been going through a huge shift in terms of our paid work and how Laurence and I balance life between us. So things have been pretty unstructured as a result. There isn’t really a typical homeschool day. When it’s smooth and slow, we start the day with some read alouds and make a list of what we want to get up to then dive into that and go out later to meet up with friends. Some days we’ve gone out from the morning, stayed out and maybe done some reading later on or listened to podcasts in the car. In busy weeks, whatever windows have found us home, we’ve tried fit in projects in around whatever else is going on. The summer term always looks a bit more chaotic anyway but I can always see on reflection that the kids are learning. I think having access to an interested adult on a micro ratio basis is a hugely valuable thing.

4. What type of a home educator are you ( structured , semi structured , unschooling , classical , Charlotte Mason , Steiner , Montessori etc )

On paper, I probably take a classical semi-structured approach in terms of what I offer to my children. I want them to have the opportunity to be exposed to certain works and ideas over the years. That said, I don’t insist that they take up what I offer and I ask for their input on what we should do together. So while I don’t claim to be an unschooler (I don’t feel like I’ve personally delved enough to any philosophy to claim a label), consensual learning is a really important tenet of our home education.

5. What do you love the most about home schooling ?

Oh goodness, there are so many things I love about home education, it’s really hard to pick one. I think the thing I love most is the gift of time. I love seeing my children get absorbed in something they’re working on, whether that’s composing a piece of music or junk modelling or creating stories in the garden. And I love that we have the time to spend the day on the beach with friends if it’s sunny or have a home day if we feel peopled out. Recently we’ve had two family birthdays, both on school days and it’s brilliant that all the siblings can be together to celebrate special days like that. It’s mostly an unhurried life though I do have to be careful to guard our time because even home educators can easily overfill life.

6.What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

I honestly don’t think I teach anything. I do read through things with my children but the intention is to facilitate and, for me, that’s a necessary distinction. I’d say my favourite subjects to facilitate are history and creative writing because those are my own points of interest and my kids pick up on that. I’m probably least interested in maths myself but my kids love it so I hold space for them to work and play with it. I enjoy seeing them enjoy figuring things out.

7. What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children?

Organisation is a constant challenge for me so I often struggle to plan our days and weeks well enough that we have time for things the kids want to do, whether that’s sewing or baking or playing a game together. It’s easy to reach the end of another week and say that we’d meant to do that thing but didn’t get around to it. Not having enough time to myself used to be the challenge but that’s improved a lot since Laurence and I started sharing time with the kids. I also sometimes find it stressful having to organise social meet ups but this really depends on where I am in menstrual cycle. There are a few days a month where I feel both like we don’t have any friends and like I can’t face going to any groups! 😀

8. How do you deal with unsupportive family, relatives and friends ?

At this point in time, our family and friends are fortunately supportive of what we do or at least respect our right as decision makers even when they don’t agree with home education. When I meet people who are uncomfortable with the idea, I either find a way to move the conversation along to another topic or I try to respond curiosity: “That’s an interesting way of looking at it. Why do you say that?” Generally I find, when people who know you well are unsupportive of your choices, it may take time for them to see the value in what you’re doing. It’s probably also better (for your own sake!) to tell yourself that their negativity is coming from a place of love and concern and exercise healthy boundaries as needed. What a difficult position to be in – offer yourself compassion in that!

9. Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years time ?

Well, my eldest will be thirteen by then. I used to think she’d go to secondary school but she’s not keen at the idea currently and my kids would have to really want to go for me to want to send them, I think. The further we go on this journey and the more I learn about the school system, the more I value their freedom and self-direction as vital for their future. At the same time, I don’t know what the next five years hold. Things could change radically for us and maybe the kids would need to go to school. As far as I can see, they’ll be home but I’m always aware we need to hold the future lightly.

10. What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children ?

Get to know other home educators and courageously reach out and build a community for yourself and your family. Talk to more experienced families about how it works socially, psychologically, practically and financially. Don’t worry about your approach looking like anyone else’s and don’t feel that you need to own anything specific to be able to do this. Read lots about it – cast aside anything that doesn’t feel like right for your family or ask yourself why you feel challenged by it. Listen to podcasts or audio books or TED talks if any of those are a better fit for your life right now. And take your time. You can even take it year by year. You don’t have to make a forever decision right now. You don’t even have to jump into a specific way of doing things.

12 Hajj and Eid ul- Adha books for children

Throughout the years, I have always found it a struggle to find books on Hajj and Eid ul -Adha. There are so many more books for Ramadan in comparison to the blessed month of Dhul Hijjah. However, I made it a bit of a mission for myself to find more books related to Hajj. So here is a selection of the various books. I have separated them in two sections – books on Hajj and books on Eid-ul Adha. This post uses affiliated links .

Hajj books

1 )”I am Hajj”

Paperback

Author- Amal Al Aride

Publisher- Safo Publications

Target group – 2-5 years old

“Amal Issa Al-Aride is the founder of Safoo Publications and has over 10 years experience in children’s broadcasting, production, animation and screen writing. Safoo Publications is a children’s publishing house with a team of creatives whose main mission is to encourage knowledge, awareness & kindness with all. Safoo’s ethos is to be just & capture the truth about what faith is all about and to entertain, educate & inspire readers from all faiths, for generations. Amal has also produced content for multiple broadcasting stations in the UK and Middle East and has contributed to hundreds of televised productions.”

This is a really adorable book for young children. It goes through the various Hajj rituals and practices in a child friendly way , with simple words, making it very easy for young children to understand what Hajj is. The illustrations are also very cute. I was really actually very pleasantly surprised at how lovely this book is. There are two more books in the same series ” I am Salah ” and ” I am the Holy Quran. ” I am Hajj” can be bought from Amazon- https://amzn.to/2SHOslY

2) Hajj Harmonies

Paperback

Author- Elizabeth Lymer

Publisher- Createspace Independent Publishing Company 2015

Illustrations– Kim Remann, Sandy Quigley

Age Range- 2-5

“Hajj Harmonies takes children along a melodious journey through the pillars of Hajj and the Islamic requirements for making pilgrimage to the Holy city of Makkah. Share the beauty of Hajj with the children in your life through lyrical nursery rhymes and colouring pages. ”

We are big fans of Elizabeth Lymer and have nearly almost all of her books. Needless to say she is a very gifted author and her rhymes are always very catchy and playful . This poetry book is absolutely fantastic for babies , toddlers and preschoolers. There are 12 nursery rhymes, based on some of the most popular English nursery rhymes such as ” Mary had a little lamb”, ” A big red bus”, Wind the Bobbin up ” and many more. And if you do not know the tunes, you do not have to worry, because Hajj Harmonies are on Elizabeth Lymer’s YouTube channel free of charge and with no advertisements – how can you now love this ?! The colouring pages are without any features of the faces and you can easily photocopy them if you have more than one child and you want to reuse the book. Hajj Harmonies always makes a great book if you are teacher in a Sunday Islamic school . The book can be bought from Amazon –https://amzn.to/2JWqaSr

3) Going To Mecca

Paperback

Author-Naima B Robert

Illustrator- Valentina Cavallini

Age range-5-11

Publisher-Lincoln Children’s Books

“”Come with the pilgrims

as they set out on a journey,

a journey of patience

to the city of Mecca.”

“We are led on the journey of a lifetime to the city of Mecca – the pilgrimage known to Muslims as the Hajj. The pilgrims walk with heads bare and feet in sandals; they call to Allah; they kiss or point to the Black Stone, as the Prophet did. Arriving at Mecca, they surge round the Ka’aba, shave their heads and travel to Mount Arafat. Finally, though their bodies are tired and aching, their spirits are uplifted, knowing that with thousands of others they have performed the sacred pilgrimage. ”

This is a wonderful book that portrays the various aspects of Hajj. It is not very detailed but has enough information and is great to be used as starting point on what the pilgrimage means for those who undertake it. The illustrations are absolutely incredible, credit to the super talented Valentina Cavallini. The book also has a page at the end with some of the most important aspects of Hajj, such as – The station of Ibrahim, the well of ZamZam etc with a bit of information on them. ” Going to Mecca” makes a great addition to public and school libraries as well. It can be bought from Amazon –https://amzn.to/2MjPIdV

4) Tell me about Hajj

Hardback

Publisher- Goodword books

Age group- 6 and above

Author- Saniyasnain Khan

– “The story of Hajj, the pilgrimage to Makkah, begins over 4000 years ago when, following the Divine command, the Prophet Ibrahim travelled for a long distance till he reached the hot, barren lands of Arabia. There he left his wife, Hagar, and his little baby, Ismail. The story goes on to tell how Hagar struggled to find water for her baby and how at last the miraculous Zamzam spring came gushing out and saved their lives. This is followed by the great sacrifice of Ibrahim, the building of the Kabah and the call to Hajj. Today, in response to this call, and following in the footsteps of the Prophet Muhammad, over two million believers from every corner of the globe gather in Makkah every year. This book explains the importance of the annual pilgrimage – one of the pillars of Islam – with a special focus on the Prophet Muhammad’s Hajj. These exciting historical events are presented in a simple, informative style, with beautiful colour illustrations and colour photographs, so that young people may understand and enjoy them .”

This is a really great book full of information on Hajj. It is great for older children , aged 6 and above, though younger children may enjoy it too depending on their level of understanding. The book is brilliant as well for any RE teachers who are covering Hajj as a topic- it is explained in a very simple way, while still giving enough information on this important pillar of Islam. It also can be used to make a Hajj notebook for your children, if you would like to do a project like this with them. I love the sections at the end of the book too- the glossary of Hajj, Places of Hajj and other historical sites and Prayers from the Quran and the Hadith. It is very detailed and full of information on the month of Dhul Hijjah. Last but not least, if you are a revert to Islam , you will also find the book very helpful, as a starting point. It can be bought from Amazon-https://amzn.to/2GyZ6ql

5) Yan’s Hajj -The Journey of a Lifetime

Paperback

Author- Fawzia Gillani

Illustrator- Sophie Burrows

Age range- 5 and 8

“Yan is a big-hearted young man determined to perform Hajj, the pilgrimage to Makkah. But first, he must work hard on his farm and fill up his money bag for the journey. Despite the trials he faces on each unsuccessful trip to the Kaaba, Yan’s helpful nature, compassion, and generosity enable him to succeed in the end. ”

If you do not know who Fawzia Gillani is , you are seriously missing out. She is one super talented author who truly has a tremendous gift when it comes to story telling. We have quite a few of her books- Cinderella: An Islamic Tale, Snow White, Husna and the Eid Party and the Lost ring , just to name a few. I bought “Yan’s Hajj last year and without exaggeration, it has been one of the most beloved books on Hajj for us. I actually find it really very emotional every time I read it and often shed a tear. And for those who have the book, I won’t be surprised if it has the same effect on you too. And I think the reason for that is that we all see ourselves in brother Yan and his deep earning and bursting desire to visit the holiest place on Earth for Muslims and to be able to perform Hajj. The story is so heartwarming- one about compassion, generosity, selflessness and putting others’ needs before yours. I know that the book’s age group range is given as 5-8 years old but this book will definitely be enjoyed by all whether you are 12 or 62. The book can be bought from Kube Publishing- Yan’s Hajj- The Journey of a lifetime

6)The Call to Hajj; The She Camel

Paperback

Publisher-Goodword

Author- Saniyasnain Khan

Age Range- 4 and above

“Goodword’s Favourite Tales from the Quran are timeless, treasured stories, specially chosen for young children. These stories, which have proved the best loved from one generation to the next, can be clearly understood and are fun to read, share and enjoy.” This is a really small little book , which has two stories from the Quran. The reason, why I have included it , is because it contains a short tale , giving enough and concise information on how Hajj started and the story of prophet Ibrahim and his son Ismail ( peace and blessings be upon him ). I like the fact that it is written very simply , so even children as young as 4 will be able to learn about how Hajj started. It can be bought from Amazon – https://amzn.to/2SGNE0C

7) Young Explorers’ Adventures In Makkah

Paperback

Author- Abu Zaynah Forward by Shaykh Ahmad Saad Al-Azhari

Age range-8 and above

Zaynah, Maryam and Ali were three young explorers. Together with their guide, uncle Hamza, they explore Makkah, Islam’s holiest city. They take young readers on an exciting journey, revealing lands and places that were an essential part of the development and history of Islam. Join Zaynah, Maryam and Ali on this revealing journey and find out for yourself about the hidden gems that lie within

This book is fantastic for older children , aged 8 and above. They can either read it to themselves or you can do it as a read aloud. It is an in depth and concise guide on how to perform Umrah and Hajj. It is jam packed with easy to digest information . In addition , it has information on various historically and spiritually significant sites in Makkah and Medina such as Masjid Al Khayf, Masjid Namira, majid Al Bayah and many more , which I myself was not even aware of. I have found the book extremely beneficial for myself too. My children really enjoyed following Zaynah, Maryam and Ali on their blessed journey to Makkah . After each chapter, there is a ” Can you remember ? section, which is a great way to “test” your children on what they have learned or just to have a discussion. It truly is a fantastic book that every Muslim household should have. It can be bought from Amazon- https://amzn.to/2Om3wr7

8) We’re off to make Umrah

Hardcover

Publisher- The Islamic Foundation

Author- Sana Munshey

Illustrator-Eman Salem

Age range- 4-6

Salam, my dear friends,
I hope you’re all well.
If you’ve time to listen
I’ve something to tell

About the first mosque,
A beautiful sight,
Which we face when we pray,
Where the nur shines bright

“Discover the joys of ‘Umrah when a brother and sister travel with their parents to the city of Mecca and perform this sacred ritual for the very first time. Includes a poster and paper dolls to enact performing ‘Umrah! ”

This book is really great for young children , as it shows a personal experience of performing “Umrah from a young child’s perspective “. The text is simple and not overwhelming, so perfect for your child to understand what is involved when one performs Umrah. The rhymes are really very catchy and well thought. Although the book is not about Hajj, it can be used to discuss with your children how Umrah is different from Hajj etc. It also includes a poster on how to perform Umrah together with some paper dolls, which your children can dress in ihram. It is a lovely hands on activity. Last but not least, the illustrations are really good and captivating, which makes it easier for the reader to visualise the various rights of the pilgrimage. All in all, a fantastic book for young children. It can be bought from Kube Publishing – http://www.kubepublishing.com/shop/were-off-to-make-umrah-2/

Eid- ul -Adha Books

9)The Perfect Gift

Hardback

Author- J.Samia Mair

Illustrations- Craigh Howarth

Publisher- The Islamic Foundation

Age Ranger -5 and above

” Sarah is upset because she cannot find an Eid Gift for her mother. She decides to take a walk along her secret path in the woods,which always makes her feel better. There , she not only finds the perfect gift but also learns to appreciate nature and what it means to live in submission to Allah.”

This book does not give information on what Eid Ul Adha is, but it has such a lovely heartwarming sweet story of a little girl trying to find a perfect gift for her mum. It gives the lovely message that material things do not always make the best presents. The illustrations are really very bold and beautiful too. It is a wonderfully written book, that kids of all ages would enjoy. It can be bought from Kube Publishing –http://www.kubepublishing.com/shop/the-perfect-gift/

10) Peg and Cat: The Eid al Adha Adventure

Hardcover

Authors- Jennifer Oxley and Billy Aronson

Publisher-Candlewick Press

Age Range 3-7

” Peg + Cat is the Emmy Award-winning animated TV series created by Jennifer Oxley and Billy Aronson and produced by The Fred Rogers Company. It has been honored with four Parents’ Choice Gold Awards for Television from 2014-2017. It’s Eid al-Adha, a very special holiday for Yasmina and Amir, who invite their friends Peg and Cat to check it out. After they all rock out with some singing, it’s time to head to the celebration, where there’s so much food waiting! Amir explains that an important part of celebrating Eid al-Adha is dividing the meat into three equal parts, one third to be shared with someone who has less. But with all three bowls of meatballs holding different amounts, they’ve got a BIG PROBLEM! Thanks to a balancing scale, a trip to a soup kitchen, and an unexpected visit to a housebound neighbour, Peg and Cat learn all about the concept of taking from where there’s more and giving to where there’s less. Even Cat discovers how awesome giving can be. Eid Mubarak! “

We have never watched the Peg and Cat series , but I honestly have to say you do not need to worry about this, in case you think only children would need to have watched the show , in order to understand the story.. The book is simple, and only covers the basics of Eid Al-Adha , without too much information about Hajj, the pilgrimage to Mecca. The book is aimed for children aged 3 and upwards but I do feel tat three years would find some of the maths language used throughout the book a complex, in my opinion. Again, it really depends on your child’s level of understanding. In my opinion, it is geared more for children aged 5 and above. I absolutely loved the various aspects of maths used throughout the book- from fractions ( in terms of how the Qurbani meat is shared) to the concept of giving charity to those with LESS . I also really like the fact that the page numbers are maths problems ( 3+1=4 etc ). That’s all the 31 pages ! The illustrations are really brilliant and vibrant. This book would be absolutely fantastic for non Muslims , especially for public schools and libraries. It was thoroughly enjoyed by all of us and we are looking forward to reading it again this Eid. The book can be bought from – https://amzn.to/2yhhUWw

11) The Most Pleasant Festival of Sacrifice : Little Batul’s Eid Celebration

Author- Munise Ulker

Iluustrator- Beyza Soylu

Paperback

Publisher- The Light Ink

Age Range-4-8

“That year Eid ul-Adha, Christmas and Hanukkah were around the same time. Little Batula’s parents were worried about their children learning their own values and having a good Eid celebration in the US. So, neighbourhood mothers decided to get together to plan a nice Eid ul-Adha celebration for their children and the kids of the needy families in the neighbourhood. They also decide to ask kids living at an orphanage to come to the Eid celebrations. Kids bought or made presents to give to their friends at school and children in need in the community. ”

The book has a really lovely and heartwarming story of American Turkish parents , wanting to create beautiful and meaningful memories for their children. Although they have given the age range for the book as 4-8, I do feel this book is better for older children 8 and above. It is fairly long and too detailed and I think young children may lose interest fairly quickly, even as a read aloud. My 9 year old read it on her own and really enjoyed it. But In my opinion, it is definitely for older children. I do feel the authors could have perhaps omitted some information, instead of making the book that long, but as I said it really depends on your child. The illustrations are really quirky and lovely too and at the end there are three ” Notes” pages for your child to write some reflections on the book or their own experience of Eid ul Adha. The book can be bought from Amazon-https://amzn.to/2SJBX9r

12) The Best Eid Ever

Hardback

Age -Range 2-5

Author- Asma Mobin-Uddin

Illustrator- Laura Jacobsen

“Young readers can learn about Eid, a religious holiday celebrated by Muslim families every year, as well as the Hajj pilgrimage, when Muslims travel back to Mecca for the Eid, in this picture book about Muslim culture and traditions written by Dr. Asma Mobin-Uddin and illustrated by Laura Jacobsen. This Eid, Aneesa should be happy. But, her parents are thousands of miles away for the Hajj pilgrimage. To cheer her up, her Nonni gives her a gift of beautiful clothes, one outfit for each of the three days of Eid. At the prayer hall, Aneesa meets two sisters who are dressed in ill-fitting clothes for the holiday. She soon discovers that the girls are refugees – they had to leave everything behind when they left their native country to live in America. Aneesa, who can’t stop thinking about what Eid must be like for them, comes up with a plan – a plan to help make it the best Eid holiday ever. School Library Journalsays: “[A] beautifully composed story. . . . This is a welcome contribution, giving much-needed visibility to a celebration observed by over ten million people in North America.” And Library Media Connection says: “After reading this book, children will have a greater appreciation for the Muslim culture and will have no problem realising that love is an action word.”

This is not the first book, which we have by Dr Asma Uddin. A few months ago, I bought ” A party In Ramadan ” to include in my eldest Ramadan’s basket and we all thoroughly enjoyed it. And by oure coincidence , I found that she has also written a book on Eid al Adha, called ” The Best Eid Ever.” I am not entirely sure why they have given the age range as 2-5. In my opinion , this one is definitely , same like Ramadan book, geared for children aged 6 and above. This book absolutely fantastic not just for Muslims but for non Muslims too. It explains this major Islamic holiday in simple words, so anyone who is non Muslim would be able to understand what Eid means. But what I love about this book , is that it touches on the sensitive issue of refugees and their struggles to adjust to a different country. It has the beautiful message that ” sharing is caring ” and the importance of giving to those in need. Overall, this is a really touching story . The illustrations are beautiful and colourful and at the end of the book, Dr Uddin has also included detailed note on the Hajj pilgrimage and Eid al-Adha. The book can be bought from Amazon-https://amzn.to/2YkC7Wc

Homeschool Chat with Sumera Luckman

“Our entire school system is based on the notion of passive students that must be “taught” if they are to learn… Our country spends tens of billions of dollars each year not just giving students a second-rate education, but at the same time actively preventing them from getting an education on their own. And I’m angry at how school produces submissive students with battered egos. Most students have no idea of the true joys of learning, and of how much they can actually achieve on their own. “ Adam Robinson

Today’s home school chat is with unschooling mama of three Sumera Luckman. Sumera shares lots of lovely snippets of their home school journey on Instagram. She can be found @unschooling.3cubs

1.Tell us a bit about your family and your child/ children

Asalamu alaykum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu. I am Sumera, a mummy to three precious wild-lings. There is Ayman who is almost 7, Jennah 3, and 8 month old Deen.

Both myself and my husband hold a bachelors within science and engineering, however since having children I am a full time mummy, fortunately I get to spend all hours with my children building bonds and happy memories.

2. What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children ?

Apart from all that is wrong with the education system, the main reasons were time and freedom.

The idea of having my child away from me for most of the waking hours just did not seem at all right or natural to me. I want my children to have an autonomous education and to be able to facilitate their learning.

3. What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family ?

Every day is different. Our morning usually begins slow cuddles in mamas bed until everyone is up then get ready for the day ahead. The older children will play Lego, doctors or whatever else they may fancy while I make the beds and sort the baby out.

Then we decide what we will have for breakfast sometimes we cook together and others they follow me down and play something else while I sort food.

During breakfast we listen to and practice some Quran recitation and make further plans for the day or just see how the day goes all dependent on how we are feeling.

We spend a lot of time outdoors gardening, attending home ed groups, meeting friends exploring nature, parks and getting excited over animals!

Most of our days also involve cooking together, arts and crafts, experiments, gardening, a lot of reading and all kinds of play.

With my eldest we spend some time every day focusing on his reading and writing this can vary each day some days 10 minutes and other days up to 30 minutes. Ayman is very into books and over the last months has shown a lot of interest in reading and writing so I am helping by encouraging him to continue he is doing very well considering he is more or less self taught.

4. What type of a home educator are you ( structured , semi structured , unschooling , classical , Charlotte Mason , Steiner , Montessori etc )

As we do not do any actual schooling and have no structure or routine I would say we are steered in the direction of unschooling.

The children have very limited screen time which I believe is key as they are always looking for something to do, which leads to learning. We also have bedtime not as strict as I’d like but they get the sleep they should be getting.

Although I don’t know each approach in a lot of detail I am into Charlotte Mason, Waldorf and Montessori so we do incorporate them into our home ed journey.

5. What do you love the most about home schooling ?

I love to watch my children explore and play, I love to see their curious little faces and the way they light up when something excites them. I love how much time we can spend together and how I can be so involved in watching them grow and develop from their self directed learning journey. And of course the freedom.

6. What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

I enjoy everything we do together. Most of our learning is done through fun activities and play.

We enjoy nature study but I do not like handling bugs, I wish I was as brave as my little ones.

7. What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children?

I am a bit of an introvert so I find it difficult to get more involved in the home ed community and new groups. We do still attend to events and groups of the children’s interest.

I also do not get very much time for me, being there all the time for three little humans is as exhausting as it is joyful.

8. How do you deal with unsupportive family , relatives and friends ?

Both myself and my husband made the decision to be responsible for our own children and give them the education that is best for them. Nothing will change that.

We have been quiet lucky to have supportive family and not have to deal with any negativity. It’s best to just avoid negative people and their negative energy.

9.Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years time ?

In 5 years time these three bright and precious little humans will be 12, 8 and 5. I hope that they will want to continue their learning journey with their Mummy and Daddy.

I can see us doing a lot more together including sports and travelling.

10. What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children ?

DO IT! DO IT! Nothing is easy to begin with especially when it seems out of the norm to want to spend time with and teach your own child but it is the best thing you can do, for both yourself and them. I find so much more freedom and pleasure living the way we choose to.

5 Tips On How to Make Sure Your Children Get Along ( based on the book ” Siblings Without Rivalry” by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish )

three boy s jumping into the water — Photo by Marc Richards on Pexels.com

I grew up as an only child and I have to admit that I genuinely did not know what I was getting into when we decided to have more than one child. I really was not aware of all the different dynamics when it comes to having a sibling. ( a big part of me is quite happy that I did not have to deal with this lol)

When my eldest two were little , they honestly gave me a very false impression 😂. I thought , I cracked this whole parenting / sibling rivalry /jealousy -what jealousy – my eldest two were best friends. And then my third came along ! Without a shadow of a doubt , this was the pivotal moment when all things changed . In fact , I should have looked at certain signs – biggest one – my 2.5 year old son decided to pee on the baby ( my third child , when she was only 2 months old) . He still likes to remind that to her to this day , to rub it in , needless to say these two are far away from having a “loving , idyllic sibling’s relationship ) . Add two more children later and there is not a single day that doesn’t go without some sort of argument , bickering ,shouting , drama and tears :

” You stink … ; Hhahahha , you are baby , BAaaaaaaBy”

“Give me this, no it’s mine ” ( big emphasis on the MINEEEEEEEEEEEEE here)

” I want to play only with my brother , not with you ”

“she hit me ! No , you hit me – liar , liar pants on fire ! ”

I hope you get the gist and I am pretty sure you do, because I know for a fact that I am not alone in this . Whenever , I have told my husband , that something needs to be done , he would casually reply with -” Eva , that’s siblings for you . You should have seen how I was with my own brothers and sister ! It is just a phase!

What ! How can I possibly live like this for another ten , may be even 15 more years ! So , as with anything parenting , I turned to one of my best friends , who is a book worm and she suggested to me to read ” Siblings without rivalry ” by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish . I have to say that I was really sceptical but then I went on reading the Amazon reviews and that over 1 million copies were sold , so surely there must be something helpful in there . I can honestly say that I absolutely love this book , I loved it that much that I have read it three times in total and often refer to it . I also find with parenting books, more often than not, the first time you read it, you will find a whole chapter or even two applicable to you but may be the others won’ be relevant at this particular stage of your parenting journey , because you may not be facing that challenge with your children. And this ultimately leads to my reason ( or so I try to convince myself,)as to why I don’t sell my parenting books. I just never know when I may need to re- read them again . Anyhow, back to the book, because I have read it so many times , I have even memorised certain phrases ( talk about dedication here hahahaa)

Similar like Adele and Elaine, when my children were little , I honestly thought that sibling rivalry was something that happens to other people’s children and not mine. I do not know in what sort of a bubble I was living because as my children started growing and more siblings were added, it did not take long for that bubble to burst. I have often wondered why they would behave like this, why they would be so rude to each other. Why is it so difficult to just get along , to just be nice to each other? Was I asking for much ? I have always believed that once you know the reason behind the why, then you can deal with anything .

So , I thought I would share some of the things that I have found useful from the book.

Observe and write down the incidents that happen between your children– why do they argue and bicker? I personally found this very useful and without exaggeration , I was even writing once exactly while they were arguing , rather than leaving it for later. Well, weirdly I was so focused on writing the specific reason that their arguing did not actually upset me one bit . My list of why my children argue with each other is fairly big and has been changing a lot throughout the years and still is . But here are some of the things to give you a bit of an insight : touching siblings’ possessions without permission ( my 8 year old son does not like when his 5 year old sister touches anything of his – he just gets so annoyed and enraged ); arguing who is better in gymnastics, reading, writing etc.. arguing just because one of them laughed at them or looked at them the wrong way and much more…
Talk about their feelings -Once you know why your children argue, find the time to talk with them about their feelings towards their siblings. These conversations do not necessarily need to take place right after an argument. I know from my own experience that my own children and even myself sometimes need to cool down before we can have a chat. Adele and Elaine place a big emphasis on acknowledging feelings and not dismissing the negative feelings about a sibling. I have been plenty of times in situations , when one of my children have come to me to complain that their brother/sister called them silly or that they are a “baby”. And ,it is extremely easy to reply back with “Oh , Just ignore him/her”. Instead , I try as much as I can to acknowledge that feeling and say something along the lines of “I can understand how such words can make you upset/angry.. etc”. The authors mention throughout the book the importance of siblings to have their feelings about each other acknowledged and not ignored or dismissed. I think this is so important , because we often as parents worry that saying it how it is , and what your children feel about each other aloud will make it more difficult for them to get along. And it is exactly what Faber mentions in the book that “ Insisting upon good feelings between the children, led to bad feelings. Allowing for bad feelings between the children led to good feelings”
Let your children express their feelings in symbolic or creative outlets-one of the things which I have been doing for some time now with my children and something that I have taken from this book is to help them “channel their hostile feelings into symbolic or creative outlets “. My 5 year old ,for example, really loves drawing , so if any of her siblings have annoyed her , I often tell her to to draw how she feels and that often seems to work and calm her down. Drawing his emotions does not work with my eight year old son , so I use another technique mentioned in the book- to punch his stuffed toy every time he feels like hitting his sibling. One of the phrases , which I have memorised and now use on auto pilot , every time someone wants to hit their brother/sister is : “Say it with words and not with fists” If they do not know how to say it exactly , because they are little or too angry, you can tell them what to say . For example ” I do not want you to sit on my bed without my permission.” My son also took his own initiative and made a poster that he stuck on his bed that said ” No one allowed to sit on my bed , without my permission ” ( needless to say there were plenty of exclamation marks ).There are a few chapters in the book, which portray various scenarios and techniques on how to handle fighting and how to respond helpfully , which I personally found very useful and beneficial.

4) Do not compare your children- “Never compare yourself to others , you will become either vein or bitter .” This is really one of those things, which I have to say, you can very easily fall into if you are a parent of two or more children. I have been in those situations myself quite a few times , where I just felt that in order to prove the point to one of my children, I had to insert the name of one of their sibling, somehow to encourage them to be like them and improve the situation. Just to give an example. my daughter can be quite messy and a bit of a hoarder ( you know one of those children who will keep any wrappers ( gift wrapper, chocolate ones, from something which she ate 10 months ago, labels ) you name it, its all in her drawers . I have said, in the past, to her when feeling frustrated myself , ” Why can’t you be more organised and tidy like your brother ?” I have realised in the last few years how this is so wrong to do. Even now, when I have the urge to compare them, I just bite the tongue and just do not say the name of their sibling. Adele and Elaine have a brilliant chapter on this , where they emphasise the importance of telling your child whatever you want to say directly, without any reference to their sibling. Resist the urge to compare, instead “describe”- describe what you see, describe what you feel :” It bothers me that you have so many wrappers and litter in your drawers “, describe what needs to be done, instead of comparing one child favourably to the other.

5) “Children do not need to be treated equally. They need to be treated uniquely”– I do now know about you, but as a parent, I have often been asked at various stages of my parenthood journey ( my husband as well ), one particular question by more or less all my children, apart from the baby ( no doubt she will ask that too when she learns how to speak lol)- ” Who do you love the most ?” Yep, it’s that tricky , most oft dreaded question , isn’t it ? And I can honestly see why as a loving mother and father , it’s very easy to reply with ” I love you all the same “. Opps, wrong answer !!!!! Adele and Elaine write extensively in the book on this- the importance of showing how all your children are loved uniquely, to focus as well on each child’s individual needs , instead of worrying about equal amounts and giving time to them according to need instead of giving equal time to each of your children. And alright, I will give you the correct answer to the question ( hahaha) : ” You are the only “you”in the whole wide world. No one could ever take your place “! It sounds so simple, right, when you actually come to think of it.

I hope you enjoyed my reflections on this book and that you found them helpful. There is a lot more that I can write on this particular topic But I really do not wish to turn it into a very, very long essay, and to fall into the trap of making this a summary of the book ( I do not think I can do it justice ). In case, someone things, that my children no longer quarrel – you could not be far away from the truth. They still bicker and have their moments, but I honestly find it a little bit easier in dealing with it. And a big reason for this is this incredible book- full of so much wisdom, practical guidelines, lots of advice and useful techniques that you can use together with your spouse. And to conclude this blog post, I thought I will share with you, this particular excerpt from the book, which I absolutely love :

” Siblings relationships are fluid, changing , constantly in process. At different periods of their lives, brothers and sisters draw apart or come together. There is no way that we as parents can mandate a fixed, close, loving relationship between our children. However, what we can do, with skills and goodwill, is remove the usual obstacles to sibling harmony, so that when our children are ready to reach out to one another, the road is clear. The Challenge is difficult. But it is merely difficult. It is not impossible. We need to deal with our own feelings, help our children to deal with their feelings, and somehow take all the raw, angry, confusing emotions generated by sibling rivalry and use them. Yes, use them to grow into more sensitive , aware , caring human beings. Use them to learn how to live together despite deep differences.

“Siblings without rivalry – Help your children live together so you can live too ” by Adele Faber and Elaine Mazlish can be bought from here- https://amzn.to/2GoSwCV ( affiliated link )

Homeschool Chat with Sophie Aguirre

“To make the most of this homeschooling life, we need to create the conditions for our children to thrive. Indoor and outdoor environments rich with imaginative play, natural objects, interesting people, good books, art supplies, and organic experiences, to name a few. And above all, a parent committed to letting them explore, learn and grow at their own pace. “Ainsley Arment

Today’s Tuesday’s home school chat brings you Muslim mama of three , Sophie. You can find Sophie on Instagram @ourjourneyathome, where she shares lovely snippets of their home ed journey and what they get up to.

1)Tell us a bit about your family and your child/ children

Asalaam Aleikum , my name is Sophie. I am a Belgian convert and moved to London, UK nearly nine years ago when I married my Algerian husband. We have three children together. My son who is 7, daughter who is 5 and our baby who is now about 7 months old. Alhamdullilah. We don’t have many family members close by so we rely on each other a lot. I would like to think we are all very different but very close too and I pray it stays like this forever.

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2 What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children ?

I had never heard of home education until my son was a few years old and I started looking into nurseries and the school system here in England. I sent him- very eagerly- to nursery when he turned three just as everyone else seemed to be doing. But that didn’t go as well as I had anticipated and after a month I decided to keep him home and give him some more time. That is when I started looking into alternative ways of educating. The same thing happened by the time he had to start reception. I decided to let him start and try school, although I was already seriously considering home education. And again, he was not ready. While in some ways he did really well in other ways it was too overwhelming for him and I was called to pick him up at least once a week, some weeks up to three times. So just before his fifth birthday our ‘official’ home educating journey began.

3 What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family?

Everyday looks so different for us, and not very often are we home all day. But generally when we do spend a day at home we would start the day gently with our current read out loud while we have breakfast. And from there we roll into some formal work, especially with my eldest, like maths and spelling. We always seem to do a lot of reading and we love to play some games together too as part of our learning journey. Pretty much every day by lunchtime we have some sort of art or craft going at the table or they are building and playing and making animals out of clay together. I find play extremely valuable so I try to leave more then enough time for that.

4)What type of a home educator are you ( structured , semi structured , unschooling , classical , Charlotte Mason , Steiner , Montessori etc

I don’t think we fit into one of these boxes at all and I am happy to do our own thing while implementing whatever ideas we like from different methods.

5) What do you love the most about home education ?

I love the freedom! The freedom to be outdoors a lot, to take life easy whenever one of us needs some calm, to work around my husbands crazy working hours, to let them become their own person, to teach them whatever is important to us, the freedom of spending more time together. The extra time that we get to spend together is so precious to me.

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6 )What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

Anything creative! I wish we could just do ‘art schooling’ all day and abandon the maths and English, haha.

7) What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children

As much as I love to be with them, I also would like a bit more space at times. A bit more quiet to hear my own thoughts and fulfil my own needs. Or maybe the hardest part is always doubting yourself and never being able to turn that ‘homeschool-mum-brain’ completely off.

8) How do you deal with unsupportive family , relatives and friends ?

Generally I have very supportive family and friends. And the ones that aren’t so supportive don’t actually ask or say much at all so that’s fine by me.

9)Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years time ?

My youngest would be 5 by then so I would still love to be home educating, but I am open for my older ones to start school if they want to. And if they choose to stay home I will try my hardest to support them in that decision too. We will take it one year at the time and do what’s best for all of us.

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10) What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children?

Block out the noise! Don’t listen or watch what everyone else is doing but just follow your own instinct. Do what is best for your family and children. No one knows your family as you do so be confident about your decisions. Feel empowered by the thought that you have such a big influence on your families life and learning journey. A happy and inspired mum will influence her home to be happy and inspired.

Homeschool Chat with Kafayat Animashawun

“The home is the first and most effective place to learn the lessons of life: truth, honour, virtue, self control, the value of education, honest work, and the purpose and privilege of life. Nothing can take the place of home in rearing and teaching children, and no other success can compensate for failure in the home.”
― David O. McKay

Today’s homeschool chat is with homeschooling mama of three Kafayat , who holds a BSc (Hons) in Health Promotion. She is interested in health and well being. Her small home business has stemmed from her interest in selling Natural Products, which she uses for herself and her family. I often myself purchase various products from her website- toothpastes, organic honey and have always been extremely happy with her customer service. She can be found on Instagram @natural_muslim_mummy.

1)Tell us a bit about your family and your child/ children

Assalam alaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuh, My name is Kafayat. I am a mummy of three energetic children. I recently started a small business from home , named Natural Muslim Mummy, selling Natural and homemade products. My children are ages 6 , 4 and 1. As a family, we enjoy spending time together doing everyday activities things such as shopping , cooking and going to the park. They are my little best friends.

2)What was your main reason for choosing to home educate your children ?

The main reason for home educating my children was to be able to cater to each of my children’s individual needs and to provide them with more freedom than is found in mainstream schools. I wanted the ability to provide a solid religious foundation and to encourage a solid bond as a family.

3) What does a “typical” home school day look like for your family ?

As a family, we have a very hectic schedule from madrasah to swimming and homeschool Ed groups. A typical day at home would start with Qaaidah and Quran. After a small break, I focus on reading, writing and spelling with my oldest. At the same time I also work with my middle child, encouraging him to do Hands-on activities such as sorting, counting and tracing letters. If my eldest requires some assistance I would move between both children. I also have to keep a watchful eye over my youngest, to ensure that he is not doing anything dangerous! After another short break, my oldest child will work on a maths activity. We try to keep the afternoon free to relax, do outdoor activities or Crafts.

4)What type of a home educator are you ( structured , semi structured , unschooling , Steiner , Montessori etc )

I haven’t looked in-depth into all the different schooling methods as I know I would struggle to stick to one particular method. From the very little knowledge I would say we are quite unstructured as our typical day changes for day to day and we are very flexible and spontaneous. These are some of the qualities we enjoy about home educating. I like the Montessori philosophy, I do try to incorporate this when introducing new concepts to my children.

5) What do you love the most about home schooling ?

I love seeing my children following their own interests, and the ability to adapt to their needs, the freedom to choose our own schedule and the flexibility.

6)What is your favourite subject to teach and what is your least one ?

My favourite subject to teach is Geography incorporated with some arts and crafts. I enjoy learning along side my children about different cultures, Languages, Clothing and food. And integrate craft activities that involve clay, paint or drawing. My least favourite subject in English as it is not something I enjoyed as a child and I find it quite boring.

7)What do you find challenging when it comes to home schooling your children

Thinking I am not doing enough. I still have the challenge of removing typical ideas of how education should be like. Secondly, not having enough time for myself and my own interests.

8) How do you deal with unsupportive family , relatives and friends ?

Some of my family and friends don’t understand our reasons for home educating my children. Initially they feared that they would be unsocial and uneducated. However I try not to entertain negative comments. Over the years now I’ve been homeschooling, they do now see the benefits. Nevertheless, my siblings are very supportive and encouraging.

9) Where do you see your home schooling journey in 5 years time ?

In 5 years time, My eldest child will be 12 , my middle child would be 10 and my youngest child will be 6 inshaAllah. My eldest would be secondary education. and hopefully we would continue to home educate our children inshaAllah.

10) What advice would you give to anyone who wants to start home educating their children ?

For those who are choosing to home educate their children from the start, just spend quality time with your children, let them play, follow their interests, spend lots of time outdoors and create memories. Give yourself grace and make time for yourself even if its going to a cafe, getting a pedicure, going to a sisters night out, exercising, book clubbing, anything. Invest in yourself so you can give to your children.